the history of Brigandage as a band as a cautionary tale!
Rock'n'Roll Suicide pt1.
So you wanna be a rock'n'roll star well listen now to what I say.....
How to become a punk Star - or in other words - How not to shoot yourself in the foot....
• Never ever let a friend of the band help you. Next thing you know they’re managing you. It will always end in tears.
• As soon as said friend buys a white leather jacket run for the hills – soon they will be talking to other record meeja types wearing similar types of offensive leather apparel.
• When people in said clothing get you to sign a record contract READ IT! You never know when you might want/need to know who owns your recordings and for how long. Lets face it – it won’t be you and you’ll probably signed away your rights for life. So when 20 odd years later other record companies are interested in re – releasing your back catalogue you won’t have a clue who owns what and where. Welcome to the world of Hide and Seek on The Whip that is still being sold and we’ve never seen a penny let alone the contract!
• NEVER EVER have 9 different versions of your group in 5 years if you ever wish to achieve consistency, style and sound.
• This is a very important point NEVER EVER try and salvage your group by letting friends join even if they’ve been loyal to the utmost. They know you are devastated and weak and grateful for anything. This is how they get to play an instrument they can’t actually play. Have you ever tried sacking a friend?
• If friend/musician in question happens to fall off-stage mid gig and none of you notice and keep playing it suggests you need a better musician.
• NEVER EVER sack the guitarist for being too good! Get rid of the musician who fell off the stage! Unfortunately as noted its hard to sack a loyal friend.
Go get yourself an electric guitar..
take some time and learn how to play....
or how to make sure you never make any money and don't sell out to the maaan!
So you've got a band - all you've got to do is get out and play gigs but gigs need equipment and transport. You'll never break even transporting equipment to gigs so remember always borrow someone elses!
• A cunning plan I hear you all cry But the downside to this is you never get to play through the same amps twice so its always a gamble as to what you will soundlike. Could be good - could sound like The Shadows - .Lord have Mercy!
• You could end up turning up for a gig to discover the drummer from the other band plays in a tribal way and has no use for symbols which is a little unfortunate when PAUL COOK is your hero but thank you anyway RAY (Ritual,, Sex Gang Children)
• You’ve either got to have a lot of understanding friends OR be in a postion of power to abuse! Can we support you? – of course you can if you have some equipment.- Thanks to Kindergarten.
• If all else fails it comes down to barefaced cheek i.e. lies – “Oh I’m sorry but our van has broken down on the motorway so we don’t have any equipment with us” never mind the fact that it’s the 100 club on Oxford Street and you live in West Hampstead. Thanks to The Lurkers.
AAH! gigging - there's always that old chestnut of where you are on the bill - everyone wants to headline - see their name in lights but here's the rub - if you headline the only place you're likley to see your face is flat on the floor, not a good look. Too many nerves and hours to kill from sound check time until show time - this time vaccuum leads only to one place - substance abuse, well more than's professional. Always, always try to go on just before the headline band - I know it looks like you're not good enough to headline but hey! you're still vaguely in control and if you're good enough you'll blow the others off stage and still have plenty of time to drink more to celebrate(or commiserate) the gig whilst the other poor saps have to watch half the audience leave to catch their last train home coz everything has overrun as per ususal; though trying to extend your set time and overrun deliberately is very bad form.
going on first is only acceptable at the beginning of your career.
plenty of time to drink after this one
I remember playing the 100 club a few times but I certainly don't remember this one!
Surely I'd remember this one - what a lineup! and at Christmas - see its true what your parents told you.
Is it me or are you thinking the same thing -ALTERED IMAGES - in support? Someone was on drugs.
